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This Guy Reviews: ‘Zombieland’

Disclaimer: Eye Crave Network takes no responsibility for the quality, content or opinions contained within this article. The opinions and misguided notions contained are those of the author and do not represent anyone but “THIS GUY”…

Alright Guys and Gal… It’s time to nut up or shut up and enter a little place I like to call Zombieland (a.k.a. what I have been preparing for my whole life!) Ok so if you have read anything I have ever done you know that I am horribly obsessed/terrified of the living dead… it’s that whole getting eaten alive thing that really gets me… I mean it seems all well and good but when you think about it YOUR BEING EATEN ALIVE!…. and seriously it would prolly smell reaaaal bad like…. And eventually you would too (cause you’d be dead…well deadish.)

This movie was fantastic from start to finish. The rules of surviving zombieland are in fact the key to surviving a horrible zombie apocalypse. Lets face it if you are unable to run to your car while its raining without breathing heavy you have no chance… nope none at all. (note to self … quit smoking) This film was a humorous little adventure that will be finding its self in my bluray collection once its released. Zombieland was funny well written and zomberiffic! (I less then three making new words) The combination of Eisenberg and Harrelson works really well. The ol braaaaaiiins (heh) and brawn scenario is good for some laughs on both sides. Columbus makes 32 rules of surviving what the earth has become and they are presented repeatedly through out the movie in different ways. The little addition of the rules popping up on screen while being demonstrated was great it added to an already great movie.

Alright here we go. Columbus and Tallahassee are on their own respected journeys, Columbus wants to see if his family is still alive (ummm imam say no.) and Tallahassee is on a never ending search to locate the last not expired Twinkie they decide to partner up which is going right along with rule#6 – Travel in a group. Teaming up seems like a good idea because I mean really what are the chances of finding another person that is actually a person and dunn wanna to eat you face. Everything is moving along fine until the introduction of the girls (of course) Wichita and Little Rock. These sweet innocent girls then proceed in jacking their car and taking all their weapons leaving the duo to scavenge for themselves among the walking dead. Anyway I won’t go into super detail here the pair O pairs meet up again down the road and rules began to be broken. Rule #5 AND! Rule#17.

This movie is more of a funny horror movie then actually being a comedy yes there are outrageous parts and some “convenient” discoveries but when you can boil it all down it’s a funny horror movie… not a Shaun of the dead North America (PHEW!!!)

Well lady and gents, all I have to say about this movie is go and see it. NO you did not see all the good parts in the trailers. Yes there is zombies in it, NO you do not know what happens at the end. Yes go and see it but when you come back NO you can not share my land in Alaska or borrow some of my swords… Yes I will save one bullet for you. No I am not worried about the zombie apocalypse… just prepared… laugh now…. But have fun on the food chain my little human hamburgers. Imma stock up Twinkies and get me Zombie Kill of the week! that ll do pig..that ll do.

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