G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra - Theatrical Review

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra – Theatrical Review

From the Egyptian desert to deep below the polar ice caps, the elite G.I. JOE team uses the latest in next-generation spy and military equipment to fight the corrupt arms dealer Destro and the growing threat of the mysterious Cobra organization to prevent them from plunging the world into chaos.

Are toy lines the best inspiration for movies? Even if they managed to generate a cartoon series in the 80s? Yes, the Transformers movies were successful, but everyone loves giant robots kicking butt.

With this latest toy-to-film movie G.I. Joe shows that money can be made, but that the masses can’t be easily pleased? For the past week I’ve been reading mixed reviews as to what people thought of the movie. With the assorted information I knew Rise of Cobra would be something I’d have to see for myself.

I went in with an open mind. After all I have enjoyed most of Stephen Sommers past films such as The Mummy and Deep Rising. Having been left wanting more with The Mummy 2 and Van Helsing I wasn’t sure if he could deliver an entertaining film. I expected little in the way of plot. I got little plot.

Here’s the skinny – A weapons dealer has a 4-generation grudge over the mistreatment of his ancestor and wants to rule the world. Yup, pretty thin.

When it comes to summer popcorn flicks there are a few things that I expect out of them. Lets check the popcorn movie playbook and see if G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra meets the criteria:

  • Bad guy or something else (meteor, natural disaster) wants to take over or destroy the world – check
  • Good guys who want to stop bad guy – check
  • Someone close to someone dies – check
  • Lots of Special Effects – check
  • Crazy action sequences – check
  • Reality suspended – check
  • Simplistic plot – check
  • Moderate acting – check
  • Entertaining – check

I rather enjoyed G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra. That doesn’t mean I didn’t have a few issues with it. My biggest beef with it was the attempts to keep the movie serious while bouncing back to a live action cartoon. It just didn’t work. Also, Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s “Shadow” voice. You remember that movie don’t you? With Alec Bladwin. That’s what JGL’s evil voice reminded me of.

The only issue I had with the accelerator suits was when Duke and Ripcord were doing their ridiculous acrobatic moves through the streets of Paris. I didn’t mind the jumping, but when they started adding cartwheels and handstands it was a little too unbelievable.

Other than those grips I had a good time. I even chuckled at Marlon Wayans jokes and didn’t mind the so-so acting of Channing Tatum. The action sequences were great. The girls in leather (Rachel Nichols, Sienna Miller) looked great. All-in-all, it was fun.



Since seeing Star Wars on TV as a child Shane has been hooked on movies. In 2001 he decided to start up his own webpage dedicated to his new love DVD. Now, over 20-years later he continues to FEED YOUR HUNGER with the latest Theatrical, Blu-ray and DVD reviews.

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